US - Great Lakes Dark Lord Day - 2018

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Joined
Sep 6, 2014
Messages
485
Location
Chicago, IL
Handjee tasted the same as it ever does, to me.

I saw you in line I think for Spaceforce. Wasn't sure it was you at the time. Those variant lines were brutal until 6 or so when ChemTrail was available for an hour and Handjee only had a 5 minute wait
I saw the passed out guy on your IG and figured we were running in the same circles. And that certainly wasn’t the spiciest thing you posted over the weekend those more comments lol.

Spaceforce was fucking legit.
 
Joined
Jun 7, 2014
Messages
4,918
Location
Raleigh, NC
Not Dark Lord day, and not trying to hijack but you asked

A few years ago me and some buddies decided to go to a beer festival, upon getting there we decide to play a game and see who can get the most beers with spending the least amount of tickets. Well one thing led to another and I ended up finding this both with a double IPA. I don't remember what it was but me and the guy pouring it decided to get into a chugging contest. I was chugging full pours before the time he could finish half of a pour. This is where everything started to go down hill and fast.

Next to his booth was the Crisipin Cider booth, after hanging out and talking to the guy for a while he told me if I brought people to his booth he would hook me up and keep giving me free pours. I am the type of guy when drinking like that, that I am friends with everyone. So after walking around the festival and corralling everyone over to his booth I kept getting pour after pour. I cant tell you at this point how many pours I had but I was pretty drunk, and well you know what happens when you decide to eat too many apples...

After downing what seemed like gallons of cider I decided that I was hungry and instead of getting a steak and cheese I waited in the portabella mushroom wrap line. Why? I have no idea.

I then had to pee after drinking so much, I go to wait in the porta potty line and decided to was too long to wait and that I would just go piss in the woods. As soon as I started pissing I felt the urge to fart. This is where I broke the cardinal rule of never trusting a fart. That fart turned into a full blown shit, a shit that I wasn't expecting, a shit that was fueled by lots and lots of hard cider. Here is where I made the executive decision to ditch my underwear and freeball it for the rest of the festival. I start to hike further into the woods to dispose of my shitty underwear, little did I know in my drunken stupor that it was full of thorns. I had to use my arms like machetes to plow my way thru and back out.

After disposing of said underwear I then go and sit on the hill that was close by so I could relax and listen to the band. Here is where everything goes blank. Next thing I know I wake up with an ambulance and a few sheriffs surrounding me. I and wrapped in white hospital blankets, have a blood pressure cuff on me and I am getting washed down by a paramedic. He says to me " you were unresponsive for a while there". Sitting there in these blankets I realize the paramedic is actually whipping shit off my legs after my incident in the woods. My sheriffs ask me if I was there with anyone, so I call my buddies I am with.

At this point the band stops playing and realizes whats going on over on the hill, they announce over the sound system, "looks like someone had too much fun". My friends realize it was me and the sheriffs made a path thru the entire beer festival for them to come and pick me up with the car. They get me loaded up and we make the 45 minute drive back home., where I am in the back seat smelling like shit covered in hospital blankets. The entire time I was in the car all I can remember saying in my best joe dirt voice- I got the poo on me!

Fast forward to me getting home, I proceeded to pass out on the front porch, puke neon green ( I think it was from the green tortilla on my portabella wrap) and blaming my puke on out of the outside cats.

Still to this day there are only a few people that know about this story.
I find this difficult to masturbate to.
 
Joined
Dec 28, 2013
Messages
853
I hate to give any credit to Florida, America's Insane Penis, but maybe CCB perfected the release party with Huna Day? Pick your bottles up while sober, stow them as necessary and then go to the party at a 2nd location.
Until they do this, take a half dozen of your security personnel and run Bait Tote operation for most of the day.

In fact, I'd pay more for a ticket to fund this specifically.

I would also play the careless owner of the bait tote for a couple variant pours.
 
Joined
Mar 13, 2014
Messages
4,228
Location
Newbury Park CA
Until they do this, take a half dozen of your security personnel and run Bait Tote operation for most of the day.

In fact, I'd pay more for a ticket to fund this specifically.

I would also play the careless owner of the bait tote for a couple variant pours.
I fully support this idea.
 
Joined
Apr 30, 2014
Messages
882
Location
St. Louis, MO
I remember her from old Binnys days. Can say from experience that her career was not destroyed from this instance, but instead was sidelined a bit by being one of the most unpleasant employees to ask questions to or interface with IIRC. No employer wants to deal with that attitude and it doesn't matter what sex you are- unpleasantness is gender neutral.
 

vav

because the trump thread deserves a pulitzer
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Joined
May 11, 2014
Messages
3,185
Location
Chicago
I never worked with her, and didn't know she existed until a few weeks ago when someone tagged me in a Facebook post she made about how her direct boss was a scumbag that didn't do anything and didn't know anything about beer, and was purposefully keeping her from advancing because she's a woman, and if anyone had any beer industry jobs to let her know.

I either sent her a friend request or she sent me one...i think i sent it to her because her wall was closed so i could comment, and so i commented that it's a terrible idea to talk poorly of one's current employer when trying to get a new job because it's horribly unprofessional, and that she'd need to quit Binny's first because beer industry people refuse to hire Binny's employees after an incident many years ago of a wholesaler hiring away a guy and Binstein sending out an industry-wide message that boiled down to (and i'm paraphrasing) "If you poach my people i'll fucking bury you."

She responded with something like "Whatever, i'll do what i want, someone will hire me." so i was like ok, and i wasn't going to get into it over the comments about her boss, which were all 3 shades of untrue. Then i looked at the rest of the thread, did a quick scan of her profile and promptly defriended her. Clearly i made the right decision. People like her make the rest of us satanists look bad.

Although, it's worth pointing out the one point i will concede is that outrage of a woman whipping out her junk and pissing in public and/or posting that video seemingly nude (or at least topless) would get far less traction if a guy did it. She owns her body and can as she pleases with it.
 
Joined
Jun 3, 2014
Messages
470
Location
Chicago
She owns her body and can as she pleases with it.
Quoted for truth.

How many posts are there on this and other beer sites about grown men blacking out and shitting themselves? They all receive multiple likes and the obligatory "we must be related" reply.

When it's a female that's a trainwreck though, hold the phone, let's all rally the troops and spend the next several weeks shaming her on the internet.
 
Joined
May 3, 2013
Messages
15,929
Location
Florence, SC
I think in this case it's a mix of that (female vs. male), the general toxicity of the Facebook beer groups (particularly some of the ones that were involved in this case, such as BiL), and the combativeness (or however you want to put it) of the particular person in question.
 
Joined
Dec 21, 2013
Messages
9,090
Location
LFK
Look, no one wants to see someone pull their pants down and piss in public. Whether you have a ding dong or a hoo hah, let's just agree that pee pee goes in the toilet.

If guys get too much of a pass on this idea, then they should be directed to whip their ding dong out in private only. If there's gotta be a push for pee pee equality, let's push for everyone peeing like an adult in public.
 
Joined
Apr 29, 2014
Messages
499
Location
Illinois
Although, it's worth pointing out the one point i will concede is that outrage of a woman whipping out her junk and pissing in public and/or posting that video seemingly nude (or at least topless) would get far less traction if a guy did it. She owns her body and can as she pleases with it.
I tried to gently point this out on a Facebook group and was quickly mobbed by neckbeards saying. "No no, the exact same treatment would happen to a guy if he did this, her looks and sex had zero to do with this." Had to nope out of there.

Her interactions and responses certainly kept the drama going of course.
 
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